MACMACMACMACMACMACMAC

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MACMACMACMACMACMACMAC, originally uploaded by jolinjojobeans.

It’s that time of the year again when I SPLURGE on makeup. I’m a late bloomer when it comes to everything (haha, okay, not EVERYTHIING *wiggles eyebrows* ) – music..make-up… face-care. .. so while every girl was painting their faces at 15, I grew into my twenties without so much as putting on more than a dash of color here and there and only when I was going through an “I’m so ugly” phase.

So here I am in my mid-twenties and I own hardly ANY make-up. shocking! I envy the girls who can doll themselves up and look so comfortable with eyeshadow, mascara, nailpolish… me? I just can’t bother to spend the time. Plus, it all adds up! A starteer set of Clinique products are like RM500! Who has the money to buy a whole set when you’re not even sure if it’s the right product for you. If it doesn’t suit your skin after a week, then wasted lor, right???

I spoke to a dermatologist before (for my allergies) and she said that nobody really needs these skincare products. Cleanser, toner, moisturizer… it’s all marketing ploy. I totally trust her!

But I am also very vain.

Thus begins my spiral into cosmetic debt…

I LOVE MAC! they’re pricey but so worth it. so creamy, so smooth, spreads so evenly. AMAZING stuff! every christmas season they come up with these beautiful sets and this year i was in brooklyn and spent a grand total of $133 on brushes, eyeshadow, eyeliner, lipstick set, the works! See the pretty cases they come in? LOveLOVELOVE carrying them around, super duper handy.

So if anyone was wondeirng about this stuff, I can vouch for how fabulous they are! And MAC’s not even paying me to say this. MUAKS MAC!

Relationship to Costume sliding scale

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, originally uploaded by jolinjojobeans.

Last year I was this hottie naughty schoolgirl, complete with barely there plaid skirt and knee high socks. Fast forward one year later, am now with wonderful SigOther and lookit! I’m totally covered up head to toe, in comfy warm jumpsuit – this piece is part of my regular wardrobe. It was the in thing 3 years ago and I got it from MNG berlin. And yes, I don’t care how bad MNG has gotten over the years, my loyalty will never falter.

Gone are the red platform mary janes (they also refer to women’s shoes, not just ganja) , replaced instead with hiking boots. ??

From this we surmise that the longer I am in a relationship the less slutty my costumes are. Factor in age (increasing) and there you have it, next year I’ll show up as Goodyear Tire.

No nonono ladies and gentlemen… I am not going to be one of those people who let themselves go once they’re in a relationship. Sure, I tell all my attached and married friends to do that but it’s only because I want to wipe out the competition. comparison.

Look, even SigOther has more skin showing than me. He’s the leglamp from A Christmas Story. Those back home reading this and not getting it, don’t worry. That movie is ingrained only in the tv-diets on Americans. Remember how they show Wong Fei Hong on TV3 EVERY SINGLE Chinese New Year? Well, over here they play A Christmas Story on TBS for 24 hours on Christmas day. If you get a chance to watch it, it’s pretty good.

That said, I’m off now to hunt the discount racks for slutty Halloween 07 costumes!!!!

11th Anniversary of Turning 21

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11th Anniversary of Turning 21, originally uploaded by jolinjojobeans.

So after weeks and weeks of sneaking around and faking appointments, scheming and drafting and redrafting the excel sheets of fun, Jill and I finally pulled off the Surprise Birthday Bash for our boys. Surprise parties are no easy task. Especially when your SigOther is a social animal who already has plans in the works for his own celebration.

I’ve also discovered that I am pretty bad at lying to cover my behind. There was that one lunch hour where I had to run home to “meet my landlord” (marinading roast for test cooking session) and the other saturday afternoon where I was supposed to have “lunch” with Shin (prepping 6 pounds of mushroom). SigOther would have an easier time believing I was enroute to secret rendezvous with steamy lover. But then I come back to the office smelling like garlic and soy sauce and there goes my story.

The food turned out way beyond expectations and the boys were thrilled. Guests were well fed but I don’t think I will throw another surprise party for a long time. All that legwork wiped me out. One practice session, food shopping, countless back and forth emailing, phone call rsvp-ing, creating excuses and prepping and cleaning afterward -phew! Shoulders tensing up just recounting the whole process. It was all well worth it though. And after dinner everyone adjourned to McFaddens to watch Mr. Greengenes do cover songs. It’s quite a sad state of affairs when you don’t recognize half the songs they cover. Their audience was filled with mainly collegey kids and who can understand what kids today are listening to. tsch tschh…

With this crew the night soon headed into a downward spiral of chaos and anarchy. Scenes too debaucherous I cannot contaminate my blog with. So I will leave it to your imaginations and hopes that the poor driver finds his cab that Howie hijacked!

the schuylkil river

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schuylkil river, originally uploaded by jolinjojobeans.

The river’s a great place to be if it’s not wet and dreary out. Took this photo last Saturday at our annual dragonboat race. have been taking part in that for 3 years now. My back always gets sore for days afterward. Why do I continue to sign up for it every year???

We were there at 7am that day. It’s TORTURE to wake up at 5am on a rainy Saturday. Our first race was at 8 and then we pretty much filled in the hours by stuffing our face with food til our second race at 4pm. Great timing huh?

Our boat did come in 15th out of 128 though. *pats self on back*.

Nothing much to report on that day. I stayed bundled up for most of it.

More exciting posts to come. Promise!

Don’t leave me, target audience!!!!!

A-WOOWOOWOO!!

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A-WOOWOOWOO!!, originally uploaded by jolinjojobeans.

Any time I travel out of Philadelphia city proper I get the thrill of ooh! going on an ADVENTURE!! *claps hands* Even the 30 minute ride out to picturesque Chestnut Hill is loaded with excitement. Never mind that a few thousand people commute this same journey every single day to work. To me, this novelty is like an expedition into the dark jungles of the Amazon… that is..an Amazon that’s more posh and has pricier boutiques.

Last weekend I coerced my friend Kate (see picture attached. she’s the one in blue. and only two legs…) to go check out Chestnut Hill with me. partly because I was getting tired of being boxed in by concrete city blocks and partly because there’s an ongoing street exhibition of painted animals (I think they were trying to replicate Cow Parade – i LOOOOVE those cows) all along germantown Avenue. Our firm had sponsored one of the painted animals (see camel above. No comment…) so out of company loyalty we went to see how it fared in the menagerie of beasts.

I’ll say this, it looks better when it’s outdoors.

*cough.cough*

A for effort?

Better to have loved and lost….

eh…. I tried.

So anyway, back to Chestnut Hill. It’s a really pretty, posh place. For the Malaysian readers out there, it’s kinda like Frasers and Camerons but populated with stores like Bangsar back in it’s glory days. there was this consignment store that we stepped into that had items from Gucci, Versace, Furla… who buys second hand shoes that are $300?????!!!!! Sure, the original prices were twice that much but still! blech!!!

I’m ALL for consignment stores and flea markets. Are you kidding, that’s where I get most of my clothes from. I found the best vintage wholesaler at the summer fleamarkets. I love that no one else will be wearing my 50’s geometric print velvet dress and bakelite earrings. Best of all, your dollar stretches extremely far ( I paid $3 for a super funky blouse. SigOther assured me that only I have the ability to pull off a picnic blanket print tunic in red, purple and blue – I take that as a compliment)

I checked out the new Club Monaco on Walnut Street the other day and what really bugged me was how people find no problem in paying $300 for a handbag or $200 for a sweater. What really irked me was that it was these two young women who definitely looked like international UPenn students. ie. their parents had worked really hard and saved so that their kids could get to the United States and get a good, heck Great education. And how do they show their gratitude? They blow their daddy’s money on $179 scarves at Anthropologie and $300 handbags at Club Monaco!!! grrr!!!

Worst of all, if you come from a poor/developing country you’re aware that $300 is not even how much your average countryman earns back home in a month. Yes, conditions like that exist. Not within my own upper middle class circle of friends but I know that most of them would not be able to justify splurging that much on something so trivial as a scarf or bag anyway.

Okay, so the counteragument of this is that by patronizing these exorbitantly priced stores these rich students are contributing money back into the economy and thus paying the wages of the poor. Yes, but we’re talking about giant corporations here who get their goods at low low cost and raise their profit margins to benefit only their own.

ugh.

It makes me sick to think that someone will think $179 is a reasonable price to pay for a scarf.

ps: note to self. Stop turning every blog entry into some socialist propaganda.

Banana Speaks Out

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Banana Speaks Out, originally uploaded by jolinjojobeans.

So my roommate’s birthday was this past weekend (Happy birthday Roomie!!). She had a bunch of friends drop by and they went out for dinner, etc etc. I didn’t join only because I already had other plans made from before. But here’s the interesting part about the visitors though, they were ALL Chinese. China Chinese. I don’t think I ever felt so out of place! yeah, what can I say, I’m a true Banana – yellow on the outside, white on the inside.

I could comprehend maybe 10% of the mandarin they spoke (it was in a different dialect than I’m used to I think…although I’ll be honest, I only understand 10% of the dialect that i DO speak anyway). When they broke off their conversation to speak in English I could tell they were making an effort to help me feel included. I bet what they really thought was “TRAITOR! Traitor to your own race!!!” *hangs head in shame* Could feel all 20 squinty judging eyes boring into my back as I tried to blend into the furniture.

This lead to SigOther asking the profound question – is there a name (besides traitor) for someone like me. Someone who doesn’t solely hang out with their own kind. Thinking about it, it’s not like I SHUN other Asians. A quick count recalls 2 Koreans, 1 Taiwanese (now deported), 2 Singaporeans, 1 American Chinese, 1 mainland Chinese, 1 Indian, 2 Filipino.. (i’m sorry, I tried to make it ring like a Christmas carol but I can’t say i have 12 Korean friends) yeah, that seems like a VERY decent number of Asian friends. Not to mention the gazillions that I have from back home.

Friend suggested the term SPG, or Sarong Party Girl. But that doesn’t apply here. SPGs originated on the Singapore club scene where the local girls (caricatured wearing the sarong) would hunt the expatriate white men in hopes of marrying them and moving to a foreign country. Gold-diggers. But that doesn’t apply to my case. Number 1, I do not hunt white men, I have plenty of female white friends too. Number 2, I may be dating a caucasian but in the US, caucasians ARE the locals hence the expatriate part doesn’t apply.

So.. I guess I’d say I’m quite .. assimilated… It’s not strange to find people who kinda keep to their own kind, like Roomie. Nor is it difficult to find those like me who like having friends from all over. In my case I think the significant difference was that I moved here 5 years ago alone, separate from the pack that went to study in Australia or England where they have their cluster of local friends. When you’re a stranger in a new country it’s too easy to find a comfort zone with your own countrymen and I guess for me because I came alone, it was a case of ’sink or swim’. I swam. To my advantage I’ve always spoken English growing up. I regret not trying harder to learn mandarin or cantonese but I guess it’s helped me assimilate faster here.

How did I get into this pondery post? It was supposed to be funny and uplifting! damnit.. oh well. Now you get to see the pondery side of Jojobeans!

good advertising…

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good advertising…, originally uploaded by jolinjojobeans.

Cross the bridge over to Long Beach Island and you won’t miss this HOMAGE to advertising. Really, some execs have a few things to learn about product placement.

Was over at my friend’s apartment yesterday and the topic of Weirdos That You Meet On The Street came up. We both agreed that unlike on tv (case in point : Entourage latest episode – Vince gets approached by beautiful girl in bookstore) in REAL LIFE, only ugly fat balding jobless skanky dirty weirdos come up to you and start a conversation. Very much like MY most recent experience at the local Borders.

Monday.8:30pm. Location: Borders Philadelphia
I am leafing through New Englander travel magazine.
Bespectacled pasty white Man in white t-shirt (sweat stains visible), gym shorts and bicycle helmet grabs random newspaper and reads it while standing beside me.
I notice his close presence and ignore him.
Man decides that this is good sign for him to begin conversation

Man : So, do you like to travel?
Me (standing under giant TRAVEL department sign) : uh, yes.
Man : OOOOOHHHHHH.. (smiles perversely)

At this point it is obvious Man has bad teeth too.
I bury my head further in magazine.

Man : So, do you travel a lot?
Me : uh.. no (lies)
Man : OOOOOHhhhhhh ….. (smiles perversely like it’s the most interesting thing he has ever heard) Are you traveling to New England?
Me (holding NEW ENGLANDER TRAVEL magazine) : err… I am planning to. (resumes studying magazine with furious intensity)
Man : OOOOoooOOOooOOOhhh (glazed crosseyes light up. It’s the most amazing plan he has ever heard). So, what’s there to see there?(buggy eyes bulge further)

This painful exchange goes on for another 5 minutes or so. Finally Man has run out of newspaper to fake flip through and he has to move on to new magazine. I wait til he’s at least 10 pages in (and thus committed to reading said magazine) and grab the opportunity to dart for nearest door. Walking back to my apartment I constantly look back for signs of his bicycle helmet following me. The coast is clear. I still make one fake pass past my door to be sure he’s off my trail.

Who knew bookstores were so dangerous…

I’M IN A CRABBY MOOD… hurrr hurr…

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REVENGE IS MINE!!!, originally uploaded by jolinjojobeans.

I’m not in a crabby mood but I cannot resist puns. Quite duh like that.
Was down on Long Beach Island last weekend and had deathlike cravings for crab. Good thing we were by the shore ( …… ) so we stopped by Pinky’s, a seafood shack that sells fresh seafood and you can order it cooked too. fabulous!

I picked the snowcrab (see above photo) which had legs longer than Gisele’s. If I were to make a list of all the pleasure in life, picking at crab would make it into the top 10. All conversation must cease during this sacred act. The world stops exisiting when I consume this delectable crustacean… mmm …yum… it’s life finally made meaningful.

This weekend there’s a Chili Crab festival down in Brooklyn. Contemplating wheter or not to go. Already my schedules quite packed and Brooklyn IS a pain in the butt to get to. but oooooh…. chili crabs….. *drools on keyboard*

I made steamed crabs once at my apartment. Total disaster. Live crab started crawling out of my sink as I gave it a bath (to wash mud off) and my old roommate and I were screaming and hopping around and throwing the cleaver at the crawly beast. Then when I finally caught it, we had to bear the noise of it’s clawing to its death in the steamer pot. What a nightmare ! Will only eat crabs at restaurants from now on.

Life begins

My good friend Ah Diao (name changed to protect the innocent) sent me an article the other day by Iain Hollingshead of The Daily Telegraph. It was about the transition of student life into Real World life. Rang true for me especially now when I’m trying to sort out the whole 401K plan, health insurance, savings accounts, lease agreements and all that other paperwork that I have no idea where to start with. You should have seen me 6 months ago when I was trying to navigate the credit history system. In the United States, having a credit card is a NECESSITY, not a convenience. You build credit history using this credit card  and banks use it to determine whether to approve your loan request, landlords use it to decide if you are eligible for renting from them, and I hear some employers also refer to it before they offer you a job. There’s this secret manual on how to play the credit rating game and of course through college no one explained this to me and I have to figure it all out on my own. Brilliant system.

My point was, I found this article to be very relevant to my experiences in the Real World. here’s an excerpt:

“…But as a wizened 25-year-old, let me propose an alternative argument: life really begins when you
leave university with a degree you’ll never use, owe the Student Loans Company pounds 10,000
you can’t afford, join a graduate scheme you loathe and live in an expensive flat in some
godforsaken suburb of London (“because that’s where everyone is”) hoping you won’t get
mugged on the way home from the Tube.
Life, in fact, begins with a quarter-life crisis – which is much like a midlife crisis, only worse: it’s 20
years’ premature, no one gives you any sympathy and you’re too young, poor and insignificant to
buy a sports car and run off with your secretary…..Leaving university therefore feels like falling off a conveyor belt of non-stop academic landmarks
and launching in one fell swoop into the rest of your life. Farewell to brunches, Countdown and
dancing midweek to Abba in sweaty student clubs. Hello council taxes, daily commutes and
pension schemes. On the bright side, it’s only 50 years (or is it 60 now – it keeps on going up?)
until we can retire. Oh, good. “

How miserable! Yet so true ..

Here’s a toast to all of my fellow (not so)newly-grads. Keep up the good fight! we’ll be 40 some day and wish we were 25 again.

bad blogger

I’m really bad at this whole blogging thing aren’t I? I submit posts like once every two weeks. Didn’t start out with those intentions. It’s kinda like my gym membership. really hardcore in January and February but then it starts to taper off as my muscles start ripping through my seams.. oh sorry, that’s not me. I meant to write “…determination inevtiably wanes”.

Can I just say though that if only I had a pool to go to, I’d DEFINITELY exercize more (no? that claim has lost it’s credibility too huh? you know me too well). yeah… I’ve had access to pools the entire of last summer and yet I didn’t make any effort to go. What is it about human nature that compells us to rationalize our laziness? Whay can’t be DO more and TALK less? what a pack of bums.

……..

 Onto another issue.

…….

Introduced SigOther to Ali G last week. Ali G as always funny as ever. I cannot understand how SigOther still managed to fall asleep through bits of it. Ali G is funny as hell! But then again, SigOther always dozes off through movies we watch together. Begining to wonder if I have a boring effect on him. Maybe whenever he is within 3-foot radius of me, he instantly lapses into coma. Possibility….

I’m like that bald kid in XMen3. If you come too close you lose all your powers. yeaaah! *eyes light up* …except my power is to bore you to sleep. eh, I’ll take what i can get.

Anyway. Ali G. He came over to the US and made an American version of his talk show, with Borat, the flaming Eurotrash dude and whoever else. The American version really sucked. SigOther accidentally netflixed that instead of the Movie and was put-off by how lame the show was. I don’t blame him. What makes Ali-G tick is the reaction he gets from the stiff upper lipped Brits when he says outrageous things. The Americans all just played along or called him out on his obnoxiousness. That’s why you gotta love the polite Brits! they’re spanking adorable what!

*spanks imaginary British person*